VendM 44: Search and Destroy

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Jidou Hanbaiki ni Umarekawatta ore wa Meikyuu o Samayou
Author: Hiru Kuma

Search and Destroy

“Hakkon, we need to talk. Right now, would you mind?”

Since there isn’t much time before evening after we converged, everyone is making preparations for camp near the main pathway; at that time the Bear President called out to me.

A, right, right. About the Big Eater Brigade; they’ve understood that the Bear President will specially provide a reward, so they ate their fill of kara’age and blissfully went to sleep.


On both sides of me is Ramis and Hyurumi; the two of them together bought products from me and finished eating, so they stared over here, watching.

“Aa, I don’t mind if those two hear it. This time our greatest objective is Hakkon, the search for your honorable self. This we have accomplished today.”

One way or another, I have received your help. After this, please help yourself to whatever product you would like.

“Leaving like this would be fine, however there was actually another objective for coming to the Maze Level. This is the duty of the Hunter Association’s President, and a commission for the Fools of Whimsy Brigade.”

For a commission for the Fools of Whimsy Brigade, I can make some guesses, but as for the duty of the Hunter Association President, what in the world could it be?

“First, regarding the commission for the Fools of Whimsy Brigade, it’s the subjugation of the Level Ruler that is Flaming Big Bone Demon. Next, the duty of the President is to investigate the level’s abnormalities. The Eight Legged Alligator appeared on the Seiryu Lake Level already, and on this level there were appearances of Flaming Big Bone Demon reported.”

So Flaming Big Bone Demon was the level ruler. Right before my eyes, it was that intimidating and that overwhelmingly powerful that I can understand. I also understand the abnormalities referred to by the Hunter Association, However, thinking whether the Fools of Whimsy Brigade can defeat THAT is…

“With regards to the Hunter Association, we haven’t thought as far as subjugation, but the balance of the Labyrinth before the Ruler’s appearance has been destroyed, and that the number of Hunter deaths has risen exceptionally is the truth. My true intentions are to subjugate it if possible.”

Certainly, if you encounter THAT, in general you have the two choices of either fleeing or dying, na. The theory of the Bear President, moved into action by other Hunters worried about the safety of their bodies, passes. I think he’s a splendid boss.
However, I can’t imagine that the Fools of Whimsy Brigade, who acts on safety first, would undertake such a reckless fight.

“Concerning the Fools of Whimsy Brigade’s objectives, I believe it would probably be best to hear it from the mouths of the ones concerned.”

So saying, the Bear President looked over his shoulder, and behind him Leader and Vice-Leader stood up.
Leader Keryoil lifted his hand lightly in his usual demeanor; Vice-Leader Filmina bowed her head deeply.

“Ya, then I’ll be sitting down, ze.”

“Excuse me.”

When the Bear President swiftly moves to the side, the two sat down in front of me.
They’ve concealed their usual playfulness, and with all their concentration they stared at me with unusual seriousness.

“I think you heard from the President, but we want to defeat the Level Ruler. For that reason, we want to borrow your strength.”

Even though you say that, na. Why; I don’t understand why you want to take such a reckless fight, and in the first place, what kind of expectations are you having for a vending machine?

“Well, saying that so suddenly will trouble you, na. Maa, it’s that, y’know, what we call our brigade, being fools of whimsy, I suppose. It’s that, we ain’t got any plans. We’re truly a brigade of idiots that run towards those whimsies called recklessness.”

His mouth is warped upwards and he’s talking about it in a light tone, but I wonder if it’s my imagination that I see a bitter smile and a tear-stained face. Next to him by his side, Vice-Leader Filmina lowered her eyes and didn’t say anything.

“Those who belong to this brigade have an objective. In order to reach it, we are already prepared to do anything to fulfill it. It might make us fools and idiots; they might call it a stupid whimsy and laugh at us, na. Hakkon, do you know? The legend of the Labyrinth.”

As if I who came from another world would have the opportunity to hear it, so I have no choice but to immediately return “Too bad”.

“Labyrinth … in other words the Dungeons in various places in the world, when you arrive at the lowest level, for those who satisfy the conditions, no matter what you want, it’s said that one of your desires can be granted. That’s what we’re aiming for. For that, the Coin that falls in the occasion of defeating the Level Ruler is needed … or so they say.”

Heeeh…. a, that’s, could it be, it’s that Possession I have, the Eight-Legged Alligator’s Coin. That’s, it certainly is worth something. I wonder how much I can get for it if I sell it.

“According to the rumors, it seems that the wishes that will be granted are equal to the number of coins you have. All members of the Brigade members that belong to the Fools of Whimsy Brigade total eight. The twins wish for the same thing, and me and the Vice-Leader wish for the same thing. And so, the number of wishes to be granted are six. Currently, the number of coins we’ve acquired is three. It’s still not enough. Furthermore, no one has reached lowest level, na.”

So, if I use the coin that’s hidden inside my body, that means that I can have a wish of mine granted. The dream of becoming a super, high-efficiency vending machine is … a, no, that’s not right. Recently, I’ve stopped being able to tell how uncomfortable this body is, so I completely forgot, there’s the possibility of returning to being a human.

“I heard it from Hyurumi, but it seems like you are a human soul dwelling in this, na. If you cooperate together with us, it’s possible that you could be resurrected as a human.”

Of course, they’ve picked up on that. The one who had an excessive reaction to these words wasn’t me – – it’s Ramis and Hyurumi.

“I,is that really true-!?”

“I’ve seen records similar to that in books, but for Hakkon to be resurrected as a human …”

Seized by the collar by Ramis and violently shaken back and forth, I can see the afterimages of Leader’s head. Filmina-san, don’t just watch, stop it, stop it! His head will come off!

“Congratulations, you’ve won another bottle.”

When I shot off a loud recording, Ramis stopped her movements. Leader is slumped over, but it seems like he’s still alive so it’s okay.

‘Whatever you wish for’ might be false, but it’s another world so it could exist. If I was a person who would cling to the faintest of hopes, then … this temptation would give off quite the charm.

“Y,you saved me, Hakkon. Maa, calm down. Whichever the case, if we don’t reach the last level, then none of it has any meaning. Right now what we’re doing is, in order to gain ability, we’re going around to each level, and if there’s any rumors of Rulers appearing there, we head over to defeat it. By the way, Hakkon. There’s one thing I’d like to ask. You, when you defeated the Eight-Legged-Alligater, did you see a Coin?”

Here I could also lie, but for Leader Keryoil who provided me with valuable information, I’d like to answer honestly.


“So you saw it. Do you know where that Coin is?”


His eyes sharpened and a light lit up in his pupils.

Even before he had established their objective, from before I think I can trust them. There’s value in being able to use me, so I’m pretty sure they won’t doublecross us.

“Could it be … you have that coin in your possession?”


“Is that right, then the situation is great. Hakkon and Ramis, join our Fools of Whimsy Brigade … no, I won’t say that you should move with us forever from now on. However, we’d like you to cooperate with us whenever we need to borrow your power during expeditions.”

If it’s me, I think it would be fine to help them out, but the problem is Ramis. For the Ramis who’d been silent ever since earlier, when all eyes gathered onto her, she smoothly stood up and placed her hand on my body.
And then she smiled gently, and

“Un, we’ll cooperate! I want to get stronger too, talk together with Hakkon, and eat his home cooking, ne!”

“Hold on, I’m gonna cooperate too. If it just Ramis, she’s gonna be easy to just up and fool.”

“We’re grateful. Of course, we’ll welcome Hyurumi too. Then, Hakkon. Are you willing to lend a hand?”

If it’s been done to this point, then there’s only one answer to give.


“Is that so! If Hakkon’s here, then our food worries are solved in a flash. Thank you so much!”

“Hakkon-san, thank you very much. With this, even if we run out of food, we won’t end up sucking on monster bones, desune…”

Behind the Vice-Leader unnaturally wiping the corners of her eyes, the Red-and-White twins who were there before you knew it raised their fists in the air in great joy. Next to them is Shui, whose entire face is lit up in a smile and smacking her lips.
Seems like we’re being welcomed better than I thought.

“And you know, this time, we didn’t want Hakkon just for food. That said, we ain’t going to leave you in charge of dangerous situations. If it’s not you, no one else can help us capture Flaming Big Bone Demon.”

It’s words with some implications, but it seems like they’ve thought of something. They’re going to explain once it becomes tomorrow, so tonight all members are hitting the hay without pursuing their goals further.

Ramis and Hyurumi are leaning against me to sleep. Haaa, if this was a human body, then I’d be slightly flustered and agitated, but in this situation, I’m thinking it’s good that I have this body of steel, or could I be feeling that it’s a pity; it’s quite complicated.

If I had a sense of touch, I could feel the softness of a girl. Maa, in regards to these two who have faith in me, I should hold back on evil thought.

However, Leader is all fired up to subjugate THAT. I wonder how he intends to do it. And he even said he was going to borrow my power.

The most correct idea would be water, na. But, if we’re splashing water at the amount of the water bottles, I don’t think it’s at the level where that will do it. Does he have some sort of plan… It might be imprudent, but it’s a little fun.
I don’t know how I’ll be helpful, but I’ll think of some countermeasures too.

While selling products to the Red-and-White twins standing watch and the two gatekeepers who switched with them, in the middle of the night, I searched for a subjugation method.

“Everyone, I trust you’ve made your preparations. Then, let’s move to that spot. Please look at the map on hand.”

Although Shui was triggered by the Big Eaters Brigade and started eating like a fool, things proceeded according to plan, we faced the morning in peace and safety when the Bear President took a breath and called out.

He unrolled the map he had on hand, but how do I say it; the shape is wobbly and the accuracy is poor. Comparing it to the picture of the photo I had taken overhead, I can’t even bear to flatter it by calling it an accurate map.

It would be great if I could share the Security Camera image. Umm, how about this? The Points are … it’s quite the expenditure, but I was making a killing with the Big Eaters Brigade so I have quite the amount of Silver Coins saved up, so I guess it’s ok.

I choose the <LCD Panel> on the list of Functions. In the time those guys are earnestly looking at the map and discussing it, let’s try out this Function.

This LCD Panel is affixed to the front and displays the products without actually lining them up; so it’s possible to have a touch panel system to buy things, huh? Fumu fumu, is there anything else I’ve recorded on the Security Camera that I can show?

All I can do is try. First, let’s play back the camera as usual so only I can see it. And then, let’s strongly will it to be projected on the outside of my body.
Be projected – be projected- be projected-, haaaaa-!

“Aaaa-, why are my girlfriend and my figures here!? W,what is it, a hallucination!?”

The gatekeeper Karios looked to the side and looked my way, so when he saw the picture on the LCD Panel he froze.

『To leave you behind is so painful, my heart will burst … but this is my job. I’m sorry. 』

『Yes, I also do not wish to be apart from you. However, I don’t want to be a hindrance to your work. I will bite back my tears.』


By the way, televised dead center is a recording of two people’s love-love filled video.

So objectively watching is embarrassing, huh? Karios squatted down, head buried in his arms. Understandably, I think he’s pitiful, so I switch the picture.

“This is… the Maze Level-! Hakkon, what in the!?”

“It feels like it’s from way up in the sky. Could it be … what Hakkon has seen himself, it’s possible for him to project it? If I think it’s from in the middle of the fall from when the Level broke, I can understand it.” 1

It helps that Hyurumi immediately understood and sped the conversation along.


“I,I get it too, ne.”

Ramis, it’s okay if your competitive fire doesn’t burn. The figure of her with her arms crossed is cute and hearwarming, but right now isn’t the time for it.
I pause it where you can see the entire Maze and display it on the Panel.

“To think the Maze in its entirety can be clearly shown… Hakkon, this is big. Afterwards, the Hunter Association will add a reward.”

“Filmina, if you please.”


The Bear President nodded numerous times in admiration. Vice-Leader Filmina took out some paper; on it she drew a picture from the recording.
It would be good if this makes the Maze Level capture a little bit easier.

  1. Strange, no Hyurumi accent in this one. I have certain (personally made) rules for translating Hyurumi, so what doesn’t appear doesn’t appear.


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<T/n: Thank you Rash and RS for you donations!
I am working on increasing my pace… please bear with me for now.>



  1. Can’t he talk now? Replaying particular words in sequence from memory on the lcd should allow for precise sentences, even if the tone of voices is off.


    1. I thought of it too~

      I do hope he thinks of it soon! With all the words spoken in front of him, It’s wouldn’t be strange that he can converse normally with the vocabulary… as well as some… “deeply romantic” words from the Karios Couple!


  2. Ramis so cute XD
    Though I think Gallon would be happier if he could use those coins to become points
    It would be funny is he could make those coins products and he can magically make an infinite amount of them from his resupply function

    Thnx for the chappy~ Nanodesu~


  3. Although Shui was triggered by the Big Eaters Brigade and started eating like a fool, things proceeded according to plan, we faced the morning in peace and safety when the Bear President “to” a breath and called out.
    Although Shui was triggered by the Big Eaters Brigade and started eating like a fool, things proceeded according to plan, we faced the morning in peace and safety when the Bear President “took” a breath and called out.

    Good job and thank you.


    1. Wouldn’t Hakkon be an incredibly lame human though? Pretty much all of its abilities are vending based. Vending abilities don’t translate that well to humans…


      1. you know what else is hot and steamy? A freshly cooked, meatbun~
        I’m suddenly hungry…



  4. Thanks for the chapter~
    I’m new to this novel and i love it so much
    He’s not your usual mc that can be found in every light novel and have unique way to fight


  5. Just caught up, thank you for the chapter!

    May I ask though that you add a glossary somewhere for those of us not far enough into weebdom to know what all the untranslated sounds mean? I know my -sans and -samas and nes, but what are -ttes, zes, etc?


    1. -tte = …! (with a kind of, hang on a sec! connotation)
      ze = more masculine ending to sentences
      zo=same as above
      desu = usually female, sometimes childish female ending to sentences (at least, when I leave them in the translation, that’s what it means)
      are = hang on… / huh? (with a kind of derp/duh moment)
      ara = oh my~!
      desuyone = riiiigh~t? (except not a question. Like a mix between ‘riiiigh-t?’ and ‘well that’s how it is’.)

      So, yeah, they’re not really that easily translatable, but thank you for pointing that out. I will add it to the About page… soon… ish
      Let me know if there are any others I should index.


  6. Would
    (flame- big-bone-demon)
    Flow better when translated into english as
    (burning giant skeleton demon)
    Admittedly, I havent seen the raws and woudnt know how to translate it anyway.

    BTW, I’m loving this series.
    Keep up the good work.


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